Can I Get a Yes and an Amen?

“A joyful heart is good medicine; but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” Proverbs 17:22

Well, first, I have a joyful heart today because…I got a haircut! And it’s perfect!

See?

Today I’d like to talk about something that is hard for everyone: rejection (and its many forms).

I’m tempted to say that rejection is something I am particularly familiar with but really, I probably don’t experience it as much as many other people do. In some way, I deal with it almost every day. As a writer, I send my work out to editors a few times a week, hoping that it will find a home in someone’s literary journal or magazine. For every yes I get, I receive about twenty no’s. For all of those no’s, I receive even more silence. Wordless rejection. Ouch. I’m also learning to deal with possible employers giving me the cold shoulder. Heck, I’ve been trying to volunteer at my local library for months and have been told that they’re revising the applications (which isn’t exactly rejecting me outright but they haven’t been too accommodating about inviting me back when it’s finished…and that feels a tad similar).

Being in a new city without local friends has been tough too, especially because I’m painfully shy. Sometimes, for no real reason, I think people are putting me off before I even approach them and then when I gather the guts to speak, I usually feel like I have nothing very interesting to say and will come off as a totally self-conscious geek…and that wouldn’t be altogether untrue.

I definitely battle the tendency to psych myself into accepting less in my life. I anticipate negativity that hasn’t even come my way yet.

When I’m looking at job listings that show how much I would earn, I inevitably apply for the lower-paying positions first because I have told myself, “I’ll never convince someone that I deserve that much money.” It’s awful! I fully recognize how awful that is. I’m a college graduate with a moderate amount of working experience, references that are fully willing to back me up, and I have an eagerness to please, learn, and achieve.

Furthermore, I’m multi-talented, dynamic in my interests, well-versed in my passions, and even though I have a hard time putting myself out there, I’m actually a little braver than most people I meet. I don’t have walls or stipulations with others. I don’t let people in only to a certain degree or freak out when something gets personal. I actually thrive on close friendships and I’m fully willing to adopt anyone into my life that’s willing to accept my weirdness.

In short, I’m amazing and I have to quit under-selling myself. We all have to stop under-selling ourselves because we’re not just hurting ourselves, we’re depriving others of what we have to offer. When good people make good money, communities grow and lifestyles become healthier–you are a gateway for positive change. People need to hear what you have to say–all those wonderful and uplifting ideas you have inside need to come out. We all need to reach out and make friends and experience affirmation.

Not just that, we need to give affirmation.

So here’s the trick. All those no’s? All the broken relationships? The bad past experiences? The failures? I need to wake up every day and put that behind me. I need to focus on the positive answers and feelings, remembering love and good times and leaving harsh words or guilt where they lie. I need to do it for myself but on days when that doesn’t feel enough and I doubt my worth, I need to know that others need to be my whole, positive self.

And it’s so hard to do that. You’re probably reading this like, “that’s inspirational but isn’t this all a little arrogant?” NO. You need to catch yourself right here and now and start believing in your worth and the power of your influence. Do it. Do it now.

…or else…I don’t know what else but the world will not be as good as it could be, that is for sure.

Also…

BANGS!

Ha! Got you with the sneak attack.